I hope everyone has had a wonderful Holiday weekend. Summer is flying by so quickly to me. It's a good thing though, as life is fun and all our hard work is being rewarded! However, as the time has flown by so quickly this past month I am reminded to slow down and listen, by the ever so thoughtful crew at Moo.com. I wanted to share with you this awesome blog post Moo did on a TED talk about the art of conversations. I constantly need to remind myself of this in my business to be a better Realtor for our customers and clients. Hope you enjoy. Thanks, Moo!
“1. Don’t multitask
It’s not just about putting your phone down. You have to be present. That means parking anything else in your brain. “Don’t be half in and half out,” advises Celeste.
2. Don’t dominate
Good conversation means both people speak! It’s not a competition. “If you want to state your opinion without any opportunity for response, write a blog,” says Celeste.
3. Ask open-ended questions
That means questions that don’t result in simple answers like “yes” or “no”. Questions such as “what was it like?” or “how did it make you feel?” provoke more insightful responses.
4. Go with the flow
It’s important to not hang onto points that pop into your mind for too long. Jumping back to an old point stops the conversation taking its natural (and more interesting) course.
5. If you don’t know, say you don’t know
When asked, it’s tempting to say you know something you don’t. Doing this devalues the knowledge you do bring the table.
6. Don’t equate your story with someone else’s
Avoid reacting to someone’s experience by talking about a similar one of your own. It might seem the same, but it never is. You run the risk of missing out on their unique take on things.
7. Try not to repeat yourself
When we have a point to make, especially in work conversations, we tend to rephrase it over and over, which is “condescending and really boring”.
8. Don’t get lost in the details
Fixating on details can slow conversation to a halt. “People don’t care. What they care about is you,” says Celeste, so focus on showing “what you’re like, what you have in common”.
9. Listen
This is the most important one, says Celeste, noting that “it takes effort and energy to actually pay attention to someone.” Listen with the aim of understanding the other person, not so you can craft a witty reply.
10. Be brief and effective
Celeste ended the tips with a quote from her sister: “A good conversation is like a miniskirt; short enough to retain interest, but long enough to cover the subject.”
Key takeout:
It all comes down to being interested. “Everyone is an expert on something,” says Celeste. So if you can meaningfully connect with others, you’ll always find something new to learn.”